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Friday, 11 February 2011

Worrying About What Other People Think

Many of us worry about what other people think of us, whether it's the way we dress, what we do, or how we act. This can often lead to low self-esteem, negative thinking and a lack of confidence which then only fuels the worry and a viscous circle begins.

I subscribe to a very informative newsletter written by Terence Watts through his website Hypnosense. In the newsletter this week it had a story in it which I found really interesting to read and it can be a great help if you worry too much about what others think.

The Red Jacket

Imagine that you have gone out clothes shopping and just happened upon a bright red jacket - something you would not normally wear. When you try it on, however, you like it so much that you decide to wear it straight away. as you leave the shop you meet somebody you know who does a double take and says: "Hi - WOW! That's a great jacket and looks terrific on you! It REALLY suits you!" This pleases you and you go on your way.

A little further along the road, you meet a couple that you know and this time the reaction is slightly different. "Oh! That's bright isn't it?" one of them says. And the other continues: "Hmm. nice colour, I suppose - a bit bright for my taste, but it probably suits you well enough, I think."

Naturally, after the first one, this response disappoints you and you continue on your way wishing you felt as positive as you had in the shop.

A few moments later you meet a third 'friend' who stares, chuckles and says: "My goodness me! How much did they pay you take that out of the shop? I'll get me sunglasses I think! No, no, don't tell me - you're going to a fancy dress party! HaHaHa!"

Now the question is, which one of those three individuals would you believe? The one who said it was great? The couple who thought it was a bit bright but 'probably' suited you well enough? Or the one who thought it looked like a fancy dress outfit?

Many people, if not most, will plump for that third one. But in truth, you should believe NONE of them! The jacket was always the same and you were always the same; all that's happened is that each person has told you his or her own thoughts - and those thoughts are based on their life, their background, their wishes and fears. things which have nothing to do with your life at all.

The truth of it all is that no matter what you do and how you are, some people will like you and things you like, some people won't like you, and the probability is that most people won't mind one way or the other.

Quite often, life is just like that red jacket.


Hypnotherapy can help break the pattern of negative thinking and help you stop worrying about what others think about you. It can help boost your confidence and improve your self esteem. More information about Hypnotherapy can be found on my Hypnotherapy in Bristol website.

3 comments:

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  2. This is one of many metaphors that I use with my clients to help bring about change in their life.

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